GROW through what you GO through
We all face various situations in life.
I know there’s several I’d rather just GET through more than GO through- Anyone?
But as I look back, I know these times have been a vital part of shaping my character, imparting new wisdom and building my faith.
It was a typical Thursday morning staff meeting (so I thought)…
As I came to my chair around the big oblong table full of some of the greatest leaders I had the privilege of working with; we were all so different, but all equally unwavering in our passionate pursuit of our united mission. We all came ready to report our departmental updates, share ideas and hear new vision and direction.
As we began sharing, there was an obvious underlining frustration stirring.
The conversation became directed towards my area, my department, then very specifically me. I had no idea that there was misinformation given ahead of our meeting.
A few weeks prior,I was asked to begin working partially in another department. I assumed (my fault- lesson learned) this was communicated and directed by all leadership. So as the questions and frustrations were expressed openly, instead of answering and explaining myself, I was flustered and my mind went blank!
I have no problem responding in the face of adversity, and especially personal questioning, but today was different. As the words continued to come, I realized the person who directed me prior, not only didn’t communicate this, but just sat there, not taking any responsibility, not clarifying anything in this moment.
They just sat quiet while I was being criticized to the point of breaking down.
Have you ever had a situation go in slow motion all of the sudden?
This is exactly what happened. Why wouldn’t anyone speak up? Why was everyone allowing this? What went on for only 10 minutes felt like and entire hour! I just wanted to disappear. It was one of the most uncomfortable and embarrassing moments I can remember. I went into my office, completed my work and jumped in my car to head home and weigh-out what I’d do from here.
As soon as I began to drive away, I heard a whisper,
“Let it go and move forward.”
I was in denial that was even possible. So many alarms were going off inside of me but this whisper continued and was the only voice that brought peace.
“Learn and Grow” were the next nudges I felt inside.
WHAT? Really- just pretend it was all okay? No, but I had a choice to sulk in the offense or let it go. I knew this was a huge misunderstanding that Id hope at some point I could clarify but I felt another nudge tell me this:
“Even if there’s no apology- learn and let it go” — UGH!
Thankfully, this situation did eventually get clarified (to some degree), and I had almost every other person present approach me and apologize for that moment. It never came from the person responsible but I had already forgiven them and decided that my job is not to change a person- but to stay committed to my purpose, the mission and GROW stronger (not stubborn!) through it.
But HOW do we GROW-through, instead of GO-through?
Here are just a few ways I learn to power out of being stuck and grow through:
#1. GROW by extending GRACE in the situation.
Remembering that I have received amazing grace allows me to keep my heart in check and do the right thing!
#2. GROW by deciding to FACE situations vs running.
The funny thing is- we will face similar things again- so think of ways we can respond better next time. It’s like new tools in a toolkit!
#3. GROW by deciding to be quick to forgive and SLOW to be offended- PERIOD!
#4. GROW by remembering someone on their best day- not their worst.
As the memory wants to come back and replay- replace that moment with a positive memory you have of that person or circumstance. I know it sounds too easy- but it actually works.
How do you know when you’ve GROWN through it??
Well—as you face similar situations again or that very same one—you wont have the inner sinking feeling of REGRET.
You’ll think of the wisdom you gleaned and are now using instead! You’ll experience a sense of RELIEF instead. Besides, who wants to stay stuck? NOT ME!